What MLB stands to lose

The universal DH, with all its uniformity, practicality and Shohei Ohtani, saddens some of us, because it eliminates one of the underrated elements of the game: hit-or-miss pitchers, which, for 150 years, has provided great stats, stories and smiles.

Yes, we still have the amazing Ohtani, but he doesn’t count as a hitting pitcher because he’s too good, just like Babe Ruth. They are/were two-way players, as is, on a lower level, Michael Lorenzen of the Los Angeles Angels, who in 2019 became the first player since Ruth in 1921 to connect on a home run, get the win and play the field in the same game. “I have a baseball card with just me and Babe Ruth on it,” Lorenzen said. “It doesn’t get any better than that.”

And yes, a pitcher could bat in 2022 if, say, a game lasts 18 innings, if a team has no position players left and a position player gets hurt. A pitcher would have to play the field or bat. But for the purposes of this story, pitchers will never bat in the big leagues again.

“I’m going to miss it,” said New York Mets pitcher Max Scherzer, who loves to hit and run the bases as much as any pitcher in the game. “It bothers me as much as it should bother me.”

“I’m not going to miss it,” Atlanta Braves pitcher Charlie Morton said. “I don’t think anybody wants to see me strike out on three pitches and walk back to the dugout 98 out of a hundred times.”

“I was a .088 hitter and I’ve always been in favor of pitchers who hit; I love the quirks,” said former pitcher Jim Deshaies, now a Chicago Cubs broadcaster. “Jon Lester had gone 68-0 when he got here [with the Cubs], and then he started hitting. I think pitchers should hit. I think it’s good for the game. I mean, Bartolo [Colon]’s home run was magical.”

Indeed, it was. In 2016, Colon, overweight, underrated and unforgettable, and at age 42, became the oldest player to hit his first major league home run, which represented one of the slowest and most joyous trips around the bases in baseball history, and sparked one of the wildest dugout celebrations we’ve ever seen. “When we get back to the dugout, it’s just me and Bartolo; everybody else is hiding in the tunnel,” said then-Mets catcher Kevin Plawecki, who was on base at the time of the home run. “I didn’t know what to do, hug him again? And then, they all shot out of the tunnel. It was unbelievable. All the guys on the team came up and gave him a big hug. It was crazy.”

It was crazy. It was magic. Now that magic is gone.

We’ll never see it again. We’ll never see a lot of things again:

We’ll never see a pitcher connect for two home runs on Opening Day, like Madison Bumgarner, the only pitcher to do that, did in 2017. Adrian Beltre connected for 477 home runs and Johnny Bench connected for 389, but neither connected one on Opening Day; Bumgarner hit two on the same Opening Day. The Hall of Fame asked him for his historic bat, but he declined, saying, “I’m a pitcher, not a hitter.” Bumgarner also connected for two career grand slams, giving him as many as Pete Rose and Derek Jeter in 25,248 at-bats combined.

We’ll never see what Rick Wise did in 1971: connect for two home runs while pitching a no-hit game.

We’ll never see a pitcher steal another base. Wild Bill Donovan’s 34 steals are the most in a pitcher’s career since 1900. Red Faber (1915) is the last pitcher to steal three bases in a game. Don Newcombe (1956) is the only pitcher to connect for two home runs and steal a base in a game. In the early 1990s, the Pirates’ signal for stealing was for manager Jim Leyland to put a hand on hitting coach Milt May’s shoulder. Leyland once called May over to tell him something during a game and accidentally placed a hand on May’s shoulder. Brian Fisher, a pitcher who was on first base, thinking it was the steal signal, jumped to second. “He slid and just covered up,” said then-Pirates third base coach Rich Donnelly. “When he finished his slide, he was closer to first base than second.”

We’ll never see such a glorious pitching roster. In 2007, Daisuke Matsuzaka joined Cy Young and Babe Ruth as the only Red Sox pitchers to have a multi-RBI game in the postseason. Cy Young, Babe Ruth… Daisuke Matsuzaka.

We’ll never see a pitcher connect on an infield home run, the last one done by Butch Henry in 1992. It was the only home run of his career.